sickofmyownvoice:

She got it

sickofmyownvoice:

Still got it @diannaagron

shslfeminist:

my writing style could best be described as “probably more commas than is entirely necessary”

kingsleyyy:

when 9 pm rolls around, i congratulate myself for not strangling anyone all day

officialwhitegirls:

*wakes up from coma*

mom: great now that you’re awake you can do those chores i asked you to do 

rninor:

weepingdildo:

landorus:

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

"I’ll make you moan, over"

"bend over"
"bend what? over"

gurlfriend: happy fathers day
bf: but im not a dad
gf: :)

vuov:

but ur so woah and im so oh

erwinnsmith:

i respect all ships

no no, except that one, that’s gross and you need jesus.

aausten